I just read an article today declaring Supermom dead. But for my part, I question whether she ever even existed. If so, who is she? Who, outside of wealthy celebrities, have you seen have it all and do it all? Anyone?*
I didn’t think so. I’m here to admit that sometimes I yell. I’ve lobbed dishes across my kitchen (alright, one small, plastic bowl — but it still felt pretty epic). I exercise when I think about it, and eat chocolate when I don’t. I throw away poopy underwear just because I don’t feel like washing it out. I make a great show of appreciation, then immediately discard school art projects rather than scrapbooking them. I “lose” toys with annoying sounds. And I don’t read the label on the cheap, frozen pizza because I. Don’t. Want. To. Know.
This is who I am. But apparently, I’m supposed to be a size 4 supermodel, on a macrobiotic, organic, vegan diet (from which countless kid friendly snacks can be made) who is putting the finishing touches on her book deal while teaching her children Chinese. Oh…with a clean house and no backlog of dirty laundry. Easy, right?
Of course not. It’s all a joke. None of us make it to this level of awesomeness. Most of the time we don’t even come close. And you know what? It’s o.k.
Check that. It’s not just o.k., it’s normal. And we need to share with each other just how normal it is to not have it all together all the time. It’s not a competition. No one’s going to get the Mommy Oscar or walk the red carpet (unless you’ve made the mistake of allowing fruit punch in the living room).
Instead, we need to be a better source of support for our fellow strugglers — those of us doing the best we can with what we’ve got and just hoping it’s something close to good enough in the end. I guarantee we’d drink less and pop fewer pills trying to force our brains, bodies and children into some imaginary mold guaranteed to pop out the perfect family.
So celebrate your successes. Share your failures so someone might learn from them and be spared the same disappointment. And above all, let’s try not to judge ourselves or each other so harshly. Sometimes “good enough” can be downright great.
*For those of you dying to say “Martha Stewart”, I’d just like to remind you of a) her estranged family and b) Federal Prison. But I will admit those napkin holders she make from old luggage tags were, indeed, ass-kicking.
